Wire Rabbit doing Tree Pose at Grovewood Village
Of all the yoga poses, Tree Pose is one of my favorites. Some days, balancing on one leg while my opposite leg transforms into a triangle, opening up my pelvis, is easy-peasy. Other days, I’m wobbling so much I can’t hold the posture for more than a few seconds. My mood isn’t always an accurate barometer for the success or failure of the pose. I can feel exhausted and anxious and snap right into a steady pose, or, conversely, feel on top of the world only to find myself listing about.
If you’ve done yoga for any length of time, then you know the goal is to not have a goal. Meaning, you don’t show up determined to do all the poses “right,” and you don’t get in your head if you don’t do them as well as you did yesterday. Noticing what’s going on in your body without judgment gives you information that then allows you to make adjustments that suit how you actually are — not how you would like to be.
I first remember having stomach problems when I was five years old. One day when I went to the bathroom, it hurt, so I decided I just wouldn’t go anymore. This led to three weeks of constipation and multiple trips to the pediatrician, and, fast forward a few decades, a panoply of GI issues that required a massive lifestyle change just so I could eat and eliminate properly without writhing in pain.
When I consulted with the head constipation doctor at UCLA a couple years ago, and told her I thought I’d gotten the hang of things with a combination of diet, medication, exercise, and a self-hypnosis app, she somehow achieved a smile that said, “Congratulations! And don’t rest on your laurels.” She urged me to throw other holistic treatments — CBT, trauma therapy, yet more self-hypnosis, pelvic floor physical therapy — into my toolkit because a) I would have more flare-ups and b) gastrointestinal medicine has no cure for what I’ve got.
After a brief relapse when I moved to Asheville last winter, my symptoms went into remission during the spring and summer and I felt so good, so almost normal, that I tapered off half my GI meds and imagined that one day I could go off them entirely.
And then an antibiotic I took in September destroyed my microbiome and, five months later, I still can’t get my GI tract to behave the way it did last summer, no matter how many plant-based meals and probiotics and magnesium supplements I pour into it. What I know is that whatever is going on emotionally with me is replicated in my colon. I have been slammed with work from my two side hustles, in addition to my therapy practice, and while I know the load will taper off in a few months, right now it’s overwhelming.
Something has to give. The only thing I can voluntarily do less of right now is this newsletter. So after today, Up And Gone To Carolina will be published monthly, not weekly. At least for awhile.
When I was frantically googling “remedies to pelvic floor dysfunction” this week, I came across this list from Infinite Body Awareness.
Our pelvis symbolizes our sense of self and identity.
Pelvis:
Security, survival, communication, relationships
Pelvic region reveals relationships with parents, as well as how you relate to yourself
Reveals one’s sense of self, identity
The essence of who one truly is
Deep issues of power and control
I’m not sure where they came up with their information, but when I read it, it was almost as if I were reading the Cliffs Notes version of my life story. I’m happy to report that I’ve transformed from a child who didn’t feel she truly belonged with anyone, anywhere, to a grown woman at home in the world, and with others. The thing is, I’m not sure my pelvis has gotten the memo that it doesn’t have to be on high alert 24/7.
So I am adding a new pelvic floor holistic routine to my GI maintenance repertoire. Since most of my readership is in the over-50 crowd, I’m guessing one or two of you might also benefit from repairing the relationship with your mind and your pelvis — the seat of pleasure, procreation, and elimination. If that’s the case, check out Dr. Brianne Grogan’s Mind Body Pelvic Health 10-Day Challenge. I can’t say the program is a miracle cure, but my pelvic pain level dropped from an 8/10 to a 3/10 after just one day of doing her program, so I think that makes it somewhat miraculous.
Now early February, the Western North Carolina sky stays light until a few minutes after 6 p.m, and we’ve been blessed with a week of 50-degree temps. I had an hour break in between clients yesterday, so I went out for a late afternoon walk through my neighborhood. When I move my body in nature, I’m struck by how this simple activity changes so much: my heart rate, my digestion, my perspective.
Wherever you are, I hope the winter weather cooperates so you can get outside and watch your worries waft away like specks of dust in the wind.
See you next month!
A Votre Sante et j'attends avec impatience le nouveau rapport mensuel...
And from the Bill Murray movie "What about Bob?"...
"Baby Step to the Bus, Baby Steps down the aisle, Baby Steps to 4 o'clock..."
Wishing you well, Virginia. Take good care. I’m looking forward to your next post!